Not BAD Just a little bit NAUGHTY…
BREERRRPPP, BREERRRPPP!!
BREERRRPPP, BREERRRPPP!!!
The alarm blared next to my sleeping head and I sat bolt upright… I blearily looked around at the single bed i was in, next to a little desk, on the other side a small shower cubicle, a toilet, little sink and 3 shelves with a little TV on top and my meagre belongings, clothes all blue trackies and white t-shirts (yuck not my colours at all!)
All this in a dull pastel room sized approx 2.5 metres x 3 metres with a small window of reinforced thick plastic and a wire vent louvre for air.
My home for 12 hours a day, 7pm – 7 am.
Fuck. Fuck, Fuck.
12 hours a day with just my own thoughts for company.
The panic was rising, pulse racing and i started to gag as i did every morning…
I used the toilet, smoothed my hair in the small ‘mirror’ made of stainless(?) steel, put on my dressing gown and waited for the rattling of the keys on the guard who would release me from my panic and my cell, so that i could launch myself gasping out into the fresh air, as I joined the other women outside for a cigarette to start the day…
Welcome to Dame Phyllis Frost Centre, home to some 250 women in suburban Melbourne.
Camp Frosty – where the naughty girls go.
OK now rewind.
“Suzanne what the hell are you doing!!!” my mother screeched!
Oh god I’m in trouble again. I didn’t understand why but the look on my mum’s face said it all – YOU NAUGHTY GIRL!!
It was a lovely Saturday afternoon in a beautiful country town on the coast in Thames, North Island of NZ with a population of 7000. I was in the basement of our house, with the dappled sun shining through the gaps in the wood sending streams of golden light, I was about 7 years old and i looked down and there across my lap with her dress up around her waist and knickers pulled down about her knees, her butt rosy from a few slaps, was my cousin. We were playing Families, and i was being the Dad and she had been naughty – you get the drift…
The look of shock and horror on my dear Mum’s face puzzled me, i was just acting out what was done to me when i was bad.
I have been told I’m naughty and bad all of my life, and I don’t like to blame anyone but you gotta believe it if it’s said often enough.
Self-fulfilling prophesy??
